How My Character Was Formed

GAZING AT THE PHOTOGRAPH
OF A LITTLE GIRL OF THREE
STANDING WITH HER DOLL AND BUGGY
WAS THAT REALLY ME?

I RECALL A METAL DOLLHOUSE
AN OLD, RED, THREE-WHEELED TRIKE
AND FOR CHRISTMAS WHEN I WAS 12
A GREEN AND WHITE, J.C. HIGGINS BIKE.

I PLAYED KICK-THE-CAN AND TAG
AND OLLIE-OLLIE AUCTION FREE
PULLED WOODEN HYDRO’S BEHIND MY BIKE
EXPERIENCED MORE THAN ONE SCRAPED KNEE.

REALITY STARTED SETTLING IN
AS I WATCHED THROUGH MATURING EYES
MY FATHER’S GROWING DRUNKENESS
AS MY MOTHER’S SPIRIT DIES.

HOLIDAYS AND BIRTHDAYS
NEVER CELEBRATED, ARE IN THE PAST
JUST EXCUSES FOR DRINKING
THE FUN AND HAPPINESS DIDN’T LAST.

MOM WAS DIAGNOSED WITH M.S.
AND GREW WEAKER DAY BY DAY
I TOOK ON THE HOUSEHOLD CHORES
THERE WASN’T TIME FOR PLAY.

NO PARTICIPATION IN ACTIVITIES
SPORTS OR CLUBS AT SCHOOL
I HAD TO BE AT HOME TO HELP
THAT WAS AN UNWRITTEN RULE.

COULDN’T GO TO A SHOW WITH FRIENDS
OR ATTEND A HIGH SCHOOL DANCE
“IT’S AGAINST OUR RELIGION!” SHE’D SAY
WITH A DISAPPROVING GLANCE.

THOSE YEARS WERE SO CONFUSING
DIDN’T HAVE TIME FOR FRIENDS
IT WAS LIKE BEING IN A PRISON
WHERE YOUR SENTENCE NEVER ENDS

NO ATTENTION TO A YOUNG GIRL’S NEEDS
NO GUIDANCE OR ADULTS TO NURTURE
NOT REALLY RAISED, JUST GROWING UP
FACING A FEARFUL AND UNCERTAIN FUTURE.

YEARS ARE LAYERED BETWEEN THEN AND NOW
I’VE MARRIED, RAISED A FAMILY
I’M A WOMAN OF ACCOMPLISHMENT
INDOMITABLE SPIRIT SET ME FREE.

GAZING AT THE PHOTOGRAPH
OF THAT LITTLE GIRL OF THREE
SHE’S STILL ACTIVE AND ALIVE
AND LIVNG THROUGH MY POETRY.